THE ROAD GOES FOREVER ON

The days grow shorter and the nights are getting long
Feels like we're running out of time
Every day it seems much harder tellin' right from wrong
You got to read between the lines
Don't get discouraged, don't be afraid,
We can make it through another day
Make it worth the price we pay

The Way of St. James is the pilgrims' path from St. Jean-Pied-du-Port, France, to Santiago de Compostela, the city reputed to hold the bones of the apostle James, older brother to Jesus. In the Middle Ages, when half a million pilgrims a year walked the path to Santiago in spiritual quest, extraordinary monasteries, pilgrim hospices, and villages sprouted along theroute to serve pilgrims' needs. The walking journey covers about 800 Kms on peaceful mountain paths and country lanes marked with the scallop shell, the symbol of James. The entire journey can be divided into 33 walking days averaging about 24 kms per day.

Whether this pilgrimage becomes a torture or a wonderful experience, depends on each pilgrim. You see, if you only keep your mind on the goal - reaching Compostela - and start counting how many miles you have left to go and how much you have advanced on a single day... it becomes torture, because you lose your patience... especially if for some reason on that given day you walked less than you intended. However, if you keep your mind on the road... enjoying the paths, the villages, the mountains, the views... then the journey becomes a pleasurable experience with wonderful surprises around every corner. You need not worry about when you will reach your goal... eventually you'll get there... it may take 33 days or it may take a little longer or a little less...

That is what had happened to me... I was too worried about reaching the goal I had... when are we going to do this?... when are we going to get there?... when is it going to happen?...and everyday that we didn't advace toward the goal, I would get angry and frustrated.

I guess that when I realized that, even after being on the road for a long time, the goal was still far away... my dreams and aspirations died.

We must never stop dreaming; dreams feed the soul, just as food feeds the body. Often in our life, we see our dreams come undone and our desires frustrated, but we must continue to dream, otherwise our soul dies. When we give up our dreams and find peace, we may find a short period of peace. But the dead dreams start to rot inside us, and infest every part of our lives.

We start to become cruel to those we love, and then we turn this cruelty upon ourselves. We become sick and develop psychoses. And one day, the dead, rotten dreams make the air difficult to breathe and we begin to wish for death...

This is what happened to me... I was not only being cruel to the one I love, as evidenced in the Arjona episode and the broken connection experiment (of which I'll tell you some other time), but also to myself. And I became paranoid... and I wanted to die...

The Good Book says it's better to give than to receive
I do my best to do my part
Nothin' in my pockets I got nothin' up my sleeve
I keep my magic in my heart
Keep up your spirit, keep up your faith, baby
I am counting on you
You know what you've got to do


But now, everything's different...

I'm still on the road... walking... the road goes forever on... I do not worry about the goal anymore... I know in my heart that I'll get there some day... maybe tomorrow, maybe in 10 years... but I'll get there... but in the meantime...

I am enjoying the journey... taking my time to breathe, to appreciate the mountains and the flowers... I'm learning to find pleasure in being on the road... I'm believing again in miracles and in what people can do when they put their mind to it... I will fight the goog fight... and I'll keep on dreaming... and my soul will grow strong and happy... because I know I'm loved, and so, I can love back.

All your life you've been waiting for your chance
Where you'll fit into the plan
But you're the master of your own destiny
So give and take the best that you can
Fight the good fight every moment
Every minute every day
Fight the good fight every moment
It's your only way